9-19-2004

It's 3:15 Sunday afternoon, and I'm leaving to go to the dumpster right now.  I'm ready.  I'm going to do it.  I'm really going to go through with it.  But I'm nervous, and I'm kind of scared, too.  Anyway it's warm and really sunny today, just the way I think about it when I'm fantasizing.

So I'm all prepared now...  I've got a pair of rubber gloves from under the sink rolled up in the pocket of my jeans.  I'm going to see if I can get away with not touching the maggots at all.  I also have on two pairs of panties, tight ones, with a bunch of panty liners (long ones) inside them.  I'm hoping that'll keep everything in while I'm coming back home.

I did check the dumpster again yesterday and I looked inside the bag.  The meat really stunk bad, and there were maggots.  I mean a lot of them.  But they were still really little.  I hope they're bigger today.

I will not wimp out again.  Today is the day.
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